Frenemy

Only time can tell a friend from a frenemy down the road. Do you experience any of these symptoms in your "friendships"?

1) when socializing frenemy eagerly waits for you to say something that he can exploit to his own advantage to make him look smarter and you look dumber, weaker and inferior.

2) Frenemy takes, he doesn't give, if you show up at the pizza parlor and you're hanging out with some friends, all of a sudden you realize, whoops you don't have any dough, so you ask your friend who already has pizza and soda if you can borrow some money for pizza. No is the answer, followed by a joke at your expense. All your other "friends" laugh As you roam around like a jackass watching everyone else eat pizza.

4) competes with you in an unfriendly type of way. Has to one up you if you accomplish something or scoffs and says anyone can do that

5) he talks shit behind your back
6) Acts differently when in groups than with just you
7) Steals shit from your house, car... Borrows things never returns them. Has no respect for anything that is yours because frenemy has no respect for you.

8) Still acts open with you after all this when you encounter him, because he's having too much fun stealing and sabotaging things in your life.
9) I could probably get that girl, but you probably never could because...type of bs
10) Mimics your expressions with offensive exaggeration, like your laugh or things you say to make you feel worse about yourself

Frenemy: "Hey Jersey, what's happening tonight player? I'm going down to meet all these college girls tonight"

Wiser-xVictim: "where?"

Frenemy: "They're up in Binghamton"
Wiser-xVictim: "Binghamton, that's 5 hours away, what the hell do you want to drive all that way for a bunch of girls you don't even know?"

Frenemy: (frustrated tone) "Because of the girls man, come on!"
Wiser-xVictim: "Oh and you need me to take you up there don't you?"

Frenemy: "Well obviously, player you my boy "

Wiser-xVictim: (scoffs)"Bitch I'm about as much of your friend as a used diaper splattered all over the bathroom is a friend to a janitor at a preschool. You mooching, treacherous, shady, frenemy. This should have been something I told you Mano a mano to your face months ago. Stop wasting my time with your stupid plans, and most importantly stop bothering me. You are about as useful as a hole in the bottom of a coin bag. Don't ever call this number ever again SUCKA! "

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