Soft Top

Soft Top - A mentally or intellectually delayed individual.

Do not confuse a "soft top" with a "full retard". A soft top is an individual who primarily has difficulty with complex tasks or thoughts. Soft tops are those among us who are just a little slow. Soft tops are commonly located at buffets, public bus stops, fast food restaurants, bowling alleys, recycling centers and other such places.

The word originates from the belief that the skull of a mentally or intellectually delayed person remained "soft" for a little too long during infancy.

"Public buses are generally full of soft tops."

"Did you see that soft top using his hands at the salad bar?"

Velcro shoes, fanny packs, tie dye, socks with sandals and airbrushed animal t-shirts are a dead giveaway that you are dealing with a soft top.

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methamphibian

A person who is powefully addicted to methamphetamine. Physical traits are amphibian like in nature. Examples are: slimy skin, lack of hair or teeth, bulging eyes and nocturnal habits. They can often be found hiding at night around abandoned buildings or attempting to talk or argue with inanimate objects.

I was down in the bad part of town and caught a glimpse of some methamphibians creeping around an old pool.

Shit, Someone broke into our garage and stole all our empty cans again. Damn methamphibians!

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