Rural Dictionary

School

Facility

School Building-
The main stay and homefront of your school. You're probably saying "Isn't the building...jsut it?" well theirs also the Gym which (in my case) isn't technically part of the school It was added on after a large amoutn of time. The school building is usually a shit hole. Those with older schools (such as my own) will realize that summers are unbarebly hot and winters are excrutiatingly cold. Mostly because the school, being an old building, was built without the thought of central air in mind.

Gym-
For some it can be considered a great place, sometimes a reason to get up in the morning. Others might see it as a building for one solitary job "pure embarassment". Either way you take it, its only their for one period a day...unless you failed (which is just funny) then you have it two periods a day.

Teachers/Staff/Students

Good Guys/Girls-
The teachers that know its okay to bend the rules a bit. If you pulla prank in class they'll laugh. Its hard to piss them off and even when you do they seem to laugh afterwards. They won't writeyou up for being late and they don't seem to be bothered by cursing. Watch out though, if you get on their bad side (which is VERY hard to do) you're going to have to go through 3 months of appeasement before they trust you again.

Fuck ups and air heads-
As the name insists, these are the teachers that always seem to fuck you over. They'll tell you they've received your report and than disregard it until after report cards go out. You'll realize you've gotten a D in english because that fucking report went missing. Then ask yourself "Didn't I hand in that fucking essay?" Yes, you did. But your teacher, being an ass, forgot it all.

Backstabbers/Assholes-
Another personal favorite (insert level of sarcasm here). Those teachers that are out to get you and that will act like good guys/girls than royally fuck you over.

Those Teachers That Need An Operation-
The operation to get the stick removed out of their asses. They come into school with a frown knowing that they have to teach "these stupid fucking kids" again and again til they retire. I don't understand why people would take a profession that revolves around kids if...they hate kids.

Sexist/Racist Assholes-
I've had a few teachers that would favor the girls/boys in class or the blacks/whites/asians/etc... and its a real piss off. You can get an extra five points for the test if you answer the question correctly and you have your hand in the air for fifteen minutes, but all of a sudden the sexist teacher chooses the opposite sex and you're left without those five points...gei.

Principals/Vice Principals- Sometimes you'll get the good guy/girl principal. They let you off with a warning and you skip on your merry way to your next class. But god forbid your Vice Principal catch wind of your mistake. Usually the VP wants the better job and thus will give you the most extreme punishment possible for the slightest infraction. The VP thinks that this is working harder because the prinicipal is basicly doing nothing. Asshole...

Students-
Ahh the part i've been waiting for. I get to list the tribes of school and the assholes that possibly tread within each. Shall we start of with a favorite? Yes.

Prep- Bleh. Tastes like slut. Preps are usually in the tightly knit groups of friends that are often rich or upper middle-class and will flaunt the fact that their daddy bought them a new car and alls they had to do was get a D-. Preps are often scene with the jocks/cheerleaders and drink socially with eachother, get drunk easily and ramble on about sports/fashion/or other prep nonsense. Preps often hate everyone else around them and see the other tribes as "wastes" in school. Preps are Numero Uno on the list of death/murder.

Jock/CHeerleader-
The jock, a lover of sports and friends (sometimes) with the preps. THey have little to no intelligence and are often seen in the "hardcore" sports like football or wrestling whilst soccer and fencing seem inadequate to suit their lust for sweat. Though fencing requires a great amount of balance and pure common sense where football is merely the destruction of ones opponent with the force of your own body. Wrestling is merely a sport of guys in spandex which seem to love rolling around with sweaty guys...yum (again, insert sarcasm here.)

Goth/Emo-
The only reason i'm lsiting them together is because they're so similar. Emo kids slit their wrists, goth kids talk about bleeding...you get the picture and comparison. The main difference is that goth kids don't moan or whine about how no one understands them. They too usually stick in neat little bunches of friends. As to where emo kids try to fit in with the preps and skaters merely on the idea that "You guys where tight pants...so do we."

Punk/Metal Kids-
The smell of destruction knows no bounds. Thats what I love about my own tribe. We, just as the other tribes, have our flaws. Though none of them are fatal, because those of who mess with us get a nicely sized combat boot to the back of the neck (CURBSTOMP bitches.)

Geeks/Nerds/Dorks-
You know them and love them. The nerds seem to stick around the "outcasts" (punks, mainly because being accpeted by the "popular" assholes would take away from the fact that we're punks and not Preps.) The geeks and nerds and dorks don't always love star trek, they don't always blab about computer parts and they don't always gripe about how this movie used crappy graphics. They're often fun loving people but very frail pale little humans. The lack of sunlight that shines into their room or basement often causes them to appear whiter than white.

Poor nerds...

To finish up Id like to state that "School Sucks" and that curriculum taught at the younger ages is often softened. We were taught that Christopher Columbus found America through an accident and that he became friends with the Natives. Though really he was an asshole slave trader who decided to claim the land as his own. We learned that Abraham Lincoln wasn't the hero of the slaves...he merely wantd to unite the north and south. Abolishing slavery was just an add on. For some reason the school system is softening the blow of learning things...which is stupid. Because in elementary school when you subtracted 3 from 9 you got 6. Now you get -6. Why couldn't they just teach us these things as they came up? Because the school wants to morph us into beings that can't accept the harshened outside world or the society that delivers grief in bulk. They want us to remain hidden and they want to control us. It sounds like such a strange ludacris theory. But tell me its wrong and how softening these blows is going to help the kids out in the long run. Maybe you'll get a cookie for your efforts.

School blows...thank you, g'night.

by Morphine May 21, 2007

291👍 44👎

Christianity

The youngest of the religions to use the same common equation.

Take someone who is supposedly the son of god, he lamb of god,(or one of the many names Jesus christ was given.) Make his birth a virgin birth on December 25. Give him special powers. Add 12 more people to the mix (Disciples, students, hookers). A betrayer who turns on the 'Son Of God'. Crucify him, wait three days for his resurrection and BAM...you get Radical (2492.683) over 9673.

If their are any holidays based around this beings life than take them out with the pleasure of getting to put up a tree for the beings life (any tree will do. Just remember, if it's a Palm tree is it now {Insert Religion Here} Tree.) And painting some form of food with food dye and vinegar. Don't forget the presents.

Christianity - A religion in which plagiarism has been used...for like the hundredth time. It's sad, you think people back two thousand and some odd years ago would have more imagination. The fact that they took the idea from several religions (all of which were based on different religions them self which were in turn based on different religions...etc...) and then made it one of the most respected religions in the world is beyond me.

Why can't I do shit like that for my homework without getting in trouble?

Sinning is a sin
Stealing is a sin
Christianity is a sin...

by Morphine April 5, 2008

61👍 74👎

Nasty Nineteenths

School

mexican leapfrog

pound me

Christianity

cum fart

Crimson Flood