pedentify

To identify someone taking a shit in a bathroom stall by their shoes.

We’re you able to pedentify who blew up the toilet? It was John. I saw his Air Jordan’s in the stall while I was taking a piss.

Hitch a ride

Walking behind a girl with a hot ass when going from one place to another.

After I get off the bus, I wait wait for a hot girl to walk by so I can hitch a ride for my walk to work.

Wow, Mary has great ass. I know.When she walked by me this morning, I hitched a ride and stared at her ass for 20 minutes.

Eharmonut

An eharmonut is Someone on eharmony who is broke, has a crazy ex, annoying kids and a shitty job who is looking for a sucker to drive crazy, support them and continue their life of craziness. Often appears much fatter and uglier in person than on their profile.

How was your eharmony date with Karen? Not good. She was really fat and annoying and we spent the whole date talking about her ex, her kids special needs, her unemployment claim and her bankruptcy case. She’s an eharmonut.

thumb service

One person sticking their thumb up the ass of another during sex

Mary loved it when I gave her thumb service during sex, but when she tried it on me I said “no thanks!”