george w. bush

With exercise and the right amount of fiber, what I hope I can do at least once a day.

By being able to george w. bush at least once per day, most of us can maintain good colon health well into old age.

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tupperware

A substance that enjoyed cult status in the 1950s and '60s, when hordes of women would gather in domestic settings to finger and fondle it at parties, often becoming rapturous in the process. It is said that, with the party reaching its climax, only the hostess would receive immediate gratification by being able to keep a bag of the substance, while the others could only look on in envy or become hostesses themselves.

Besides cockroaches, the only thing that is thought to be capable of surviving a nuclear holocaust.

Husband: Honey, I ran over one of your good plastic, resealable Tupperware storage bowls with my Hummer.

Wife: Don't worry dear. See, even after the punishment of your massive chassis, I can still get my lid on tight!

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