Wankblanket

(n.) An absolute, complete, and unbelievable tosser. One whose existence has outlived their usefulness, like a blanket completely glazed in semen.

Modifiers include, but are not limited to: supreme, shit-sucking, insufferable, etc.

Guy 1: Last week, Nate was being such a shit-sucking wankblanket, I just had to deck him in the face.
Guy 2: What was he doing?
Guy 1: He just kept trying to get me to battle! It was pissing me off.

Contingency plan

Noun: A plan saved for the worst case scenario, or a backup plan.

According to Sarge from the popular web series Red Vs. Blue, what a shotgun to the face could be considered.

Griff: "And if the plan doesn't work?"
Sarge: "I've got a contingency plan."
Griff: "A shotgun to the face is not a contingency plan. I keep telling you that."
Sarge: "Of course it is! Just look how well it works for insubordination!"

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competitive sitting

The extremely competitive sport of seeing who can sit for the longest period of time. First official high school team created for this in early 2011 in Missouri.

Competitive sitting is awesome!

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