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The act of telling the same story over and over again as if the listener has never heard the story before
My father used to tell me repeatedly about the time he met the actor Jerry Orbach. After the 15th retelling of the story I said "Dad, you're Orbaching me"
When you hem and haw and quite say no that it's accepted as a yes
Q: Would you like another drink?
A: Well, uh, I'm not sure, but ..
That's a Yesitation
The act of taking a simple Yes/No question and instead responding with an essay of such absurd and overly long length that people begin to glaze over and start regretting they ever asked
Q: Is the sky blue?
A: Well, it might depend on your definition of blue to begin with. And it's not naturally blue, it's actually colorless until it reacts with the Ultra Violet rays of the sun. And, obviously, it's a completely different color at night. And forget about the pinks and purples at sunrise and sunset ....
Dude, that's a Scottsplanation
When one feels the urge to defecate while in the shower, instead of getting out and sitting on the toilet one defecates into their own hand, then reaches out to drop the turds into the bowl
"I just saw Mike drop his stool sample in the toilet while he was showering"
" From his hand? He did the Staten Island Transfer"
When a pale skinned person spends the whole day out in the sun while wearing sunglasses the entire time. At the end of the day the persons face will be sunburned except for the circles around their eyes where the sunglasses were, keeping them nice and pale, resembling the circles around the eyes of a Panda Bear.
Dude, your roasted.
Yeah, but I was wearing sunglasses.
I see that, you look like an Irish Panda