Schmoob

One with an inability to lose their virginity. Often due to a sexual or physical impairment.

“Hey, look at that schmoob over there!”
“What a loser. I bet he gets no bitches.”

Schmoove

Verb; Present tense
The action of one performing intercourse while riding a unicycle. Often causes extreme discomfort for both parties involved.

“Hey Jamie. Mind if I schmoove with you on our way to school?”