Egotestical

A person who think they're better than everyone because they have big balls.

That guy is such an egotestical

Clum

Clum = Clown cum

I love Pennywise fanfictions, I just wan him to clum on me

Mommy Blindness

When people tell you shit your kids/pets/friends did/are, but your brain just can't register it cause you think they're perfect no matter what

Person1: I'm sorry, but your son is very overweight
Person 2: No he's not! He's just a little chubby!
Person 1: You need to snap out of the mommy blindness

Avocado person

A person or People that are a bit older than middle aged and don't look too old or too young, they're "ripe", and it doesn't last long. Just like an avocado

That guy is such an avocado person