May 5

May 5th is flip off that bitch who won’t stop being a bitch just because she hates your gut

Fuck you for being a bitch!! It’s May 5th and I’m finally telling you you’re a bitch🖕🖕🖕

23👍 3👎

May 6th

May 6th is finally hook up with that dude who you’ve been joking about hooking up with

Hey it’s May 6th, fuck it, let’s hook up

8👍 2👎

August 27

August 27th is a day where an asshole gets dumped

Hey it’s august 27 and I’m done putting up with your shit, you’re getting dumped you asshole!!!

March 19

March 19 is fuck anyone who’s name is Aiden day. No don’t fuck them, but fuck them!!!

You: Hey Aiden fuck you

Aiden: Wait why
You: It’s March 19th, a day to fuck Aiden
Aiden: You wanna fuck?
You: No I don’t wanna fuck, fuck you!!
Aiden: Ohhhh

April 3

April 3 is wedgie an asshole day

Hey Aiden it’s April 3 and you’re an asshole *wedgie*
Fuck you!!
No fuck you
No you can’t fuck me because it’s not national fuck Aiden day
Oh you right

2👍 1👎

May 14th

May 14th is the first day Jenni is free from quarantine after being stuck in her mother fucking house for 14 months!!!

Jenni!! It’s May 14th!!! You’re fully vaccinated!!! You’re free!!!

May 1

May 1st is put a party horn in your ass and fart day

Idefk why this thought came into my mind, I’m going back to therapy after may 1 tho

3👍 5👎