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A guy named Phil who has the tendency to find himself balanced on only one foot while playing games of skill, such as, but not limited to, darts, beer pong, corn hole, and bowling.
Someone go knock over Philmingo next time he plays corn hole.
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A very small man dressed as a sailor, often found in small coastal fishing communities. Local superstition holds that photographing or interacting with the sailor midget is often a bad omen and may result in immediate calamity.
Shortly after he took a picture of the sailor midget, Philip flipped the golf cart and sent his passengers flying into the middle of the road.
The action of flubbing financial statements up so bad that they aren't even remotely useful.
After that flubication on the bank reconciliation, Philip had to redo all the financial statements.
A salacious way of saying you are going to clean carpets and/or rugs, meant to make the non-carpet cleaning layman you are having a conversation with question if you are actually going to clean any carpets at all, or if you are just performing cunnilingus for your customers.
Scott could hardly talk when he got home after spending an entire day sucking rugs.
A horribly salacious way of trying to say you are cleaning carpets and/or rugs, with intention of making the reader ponder if you actually cleaning carpets or performing cunnilingus for customers.
He smelled something awful last night after an entire day of sucking rugs.
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The fat kid that lives inside of you that screams with forceful delight whenever in the presence of sweets or baked goods. Your fat kid soul urges you to consume anything with high caloric content from sugars, demands large bites, and cannot be bothered by plates or utensils. Do not feed the fat kid soul fruits unless they are dipped in chocolate or paired with whip cream.
My diet was going strong this week until my fat kid soul manifested and I gorged myself on a sleeve of thin mints.
A person who is incredible ginger (red hair, freckles, pale skin, and extreme douchyness). When a person with this condition talks you may feel urges to kill yourself. A person with this condition is the reason babies are thrown in dumpsters.
JB is the most gingerer person I know!
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