Long Island

Long Island is an overpriced overtaxed ghetto, crime is a constant fact of life no matter how high you build your walls but don’t worry getting a pistol permit only takes 2.5 years. The official past times of Long Island are drunk driving, shopping, sitting in traffic, eating shitty bagels, and returning cans to for money to buy bagels. If you are unfortunate enough to find yourself here leave immediately before your wheels get jacked, but don’t go to fast or you’ll have 43 tickets in the mail from all of the cameras.

Me: I have to bring all this trash to Long Island.
Friend: you mean the dump?

Me: same thing