stage fright

An inability to defecate resulting from an excess of chaos in one's environment.

(Shouted through a bathroom door) Would you shut up? You're giving me stage fright!

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toilet yoga

The contortions that one performs to get a turd out.

Mary-Jane: Dude, I just dropped the biggest log! Peter: I'll bet you had to do some grandmaster-level toilet yoga to get that monster out of your bunghole!