squidget

A wee fat person. Like a short squidgy midget.
A squidget.

*small fat child waddles into store*
Teenager1: lol look! a squidget just came in. We better hurry up before he eats everything!
Teenager2: ROFL

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choob

(noun) An idiot, numpty, someone who messes around. Scottish derogitary name, but in occasional cases is used as a term of affection.

Scot1: Look at me, I canz lick my elbow!
Scot2: Look at that eejjit, what a choob.

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