Sebastian

A piece of shit. He likes to pretend he's cool but in reality, he sucks up to teachers and can't stay out past 8. Likes to pretend he doesn't study for tests and thinks people calling him smart is bullying. Also, you aren't mysterious, you have a very obvious pizza face.

"Wait, who was that bean-pole pimple-covered ass that walked past us?"
"Ew. It was Sebastian."