Clam Chunder

A victorian phrase used to describe a vagina that is in poor condition or in a state of decline.

A phrase which is now rarely heard, simply because modern day sanitation and surgical procedures make true Clam Chunders obsolete.

The servant girl Jessica feared for the Queens well being after seeing her in the altogether whilst she took her monthly bath. 'The Queens snatch was certainly clam chunder' Jessica thought, as she tentatively poked a dead mouse in the eye for a bit of victorian amusement.

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end product

slang term for semen

"She took a load of my end product right up the harris!" boasted Malcolm.

Mucksucker

A term used for a person who cannot stop themself putting dirty things in their mouth.

"Bloody hell,I caught Ethel in the bins again!! She's a rite ruddy mucksucker of that there is no doubt, I can tell you."

'Jeremy knew he was letting his compulsion to put dirty things in his mouth get the better of him. It occured to him when he could not stop himself from thinking about chewing on a used condom he passed by whilst on his way to work that morning. "I am a dirty Mucksucker" he whispered to himself, "but damn I like it."'

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Pump action Snot gun

A rapid succession of sneezing resulting in mucus or 'snot' splattering out of the face of the sneezer.

Tracey was sneezing like a pump action snot gun the amount of shit she had dangling of her face.

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vagetarian

One who consumes vegetables via the vagina.

"No meat shall pass through these lips, im a strict vagetarian"

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The Monks Spunk

Something that is too good to be true.

Similar to 'the cats whiskers' or 'the dogs bollocks'

"That meal was lovely, the monks spunk if I do say so myself."

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Bent son in hedges

An alternative way of requesting a well known cigarette brand from a shopkeeper.

'Can I have a pack of bent son in hedges please?'

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