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mount olive

Mount Olive. Where do I start? It is a little place in northern New Jersey, where nobody knows who they fucking are. Everyone follows everyone, and the entirety of the highschool is basically a pack of soldiers. You aren't cool unless you binge vodka like it's going out of style, and you shouldn't even bother going within a one mile radius of the place if you think you're going to get people to listen to music other than the ghettoist shit in the universe. Weed is everyones best friend, and if you've never seen the stuff, you definitely don't live in Mount Olive. Every girl thinks they are better than the next and they think starting the lamest drama will get them known. But they are so wrong. Everyone knows everything about eachother and it fucking sucks. The highschool is freezing as Antarctica in the winter, and hotter than hell in the summer. They might as well just have the school outside. The freshman are the trashiest around, and think they're the shit when they actually get looked down on and people think they're disgusting. Some of the freshmen girls think it's cute to wear two-inch long denim skirts in the winter with flipflops, when everyone can actually see their asses and nobody thinks it's hot. Well, the guys do. The guys at Mount Olive High School are the most judgemental assholes you will ever meet. You're only considered hot if you dress like a boy and wear sweatpants and sweatshirts 87 sizes to big to school, or if you wear almost nothing. If you don't fit in to any of those female outlines, you might as well start pouring the lighter fluid on yourself because no guy will ever talk to you. If you walk around the halls without a pass, just put handcuffs on yourself, because there's no way in hell your getting past the lobby. In Mount Olive, cocaine is the new weed, and weed is the new alcohol. Speaking of alcohol, if you even go near a party in Mount Olive, you probably should throw your camera into the forest, because little freshmen who have absolutely NOTHING better to do really enjoy showing the administrators pictures of every single kid chugging a bottle of vodka, or sucking on a keg. Nobody likes the freshmen anyway, and this just makes them become even more hated than they already are. Good going! Hey freshmen! Word of advice: If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!
Moving on to the sports teams of Mount Olive. Every single sport never wins one game all season. They tried changing coaches, but then they realized it's just the kids. If you go to a football game, you may only see about 7 people sitting on the bleachers, because nobody really gives a shit. Everybody just pre-games before, and walks around the field behind the bleachers wasted and happy. The only sport Mount Olive is remotely good at, is wrestling. But directly after the wrestling season is over, comes lacrosse. And then roxbury whips Mount Olive's ass.
Mount Olive is separated in to two sections; Budd Lake, and Flanders. Flanders is a place where the only thing you will pass when driving by is a lame shopping center that consists of a McDonalds, a Dunkin Donuts, and a grocery store. The only time anybody really enters the center is when they want to steal hair products and gum because they're too poor, or come to one of the fast food places because they're either wasted or have the munchies. In Flanders, there is an area commonly known as Flanders Crossing. It is a place where every house is about 5 inches from the next, and everyone there is a huge asshole. They call themselves badass because they all live on top of eachother and they think they're hot shit, when in reality everybody hates them, and they all look like overgrown 5th graders. Budd Lake is probably the scummiest place to be. Nobody knows eachother there, and you probably couldn't turn a corner without being offered drugs. The lake is known to have bodies, dogs, and even cars lying at the bottom. Luckily, one specific car was saved from these disgusting waters, along with the person driving it! :D The only part of Budd Lake people actually enjoy is the BP gas station, because it is the only place around where you can buy cigarettes at any age and not be examined with a lie detector.
Oh, good old Mount Olive. Maybe one day you'll learn what good music is, and how white-trash you really are.

Boy: "Hey, you're cute! Where are you from?"
Girl: *giggles* "Mount Olive!"
Boy: "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY LIFE"

by ROFFLEROFFLEROFFLE February 21, 2008

33👍 17👎