crapnarok

The crap to end all crap. The destruction of the porcelain gods, or a series of events beyond a crapapalooza.

My dog died, I'm being sued by midgets, I'm out of beer, this cut is turning green and smells funny, someone stole my goat, I had a flat tire, there was an earthquake, a terrible flood, locusts, and my girlfriend just eloped with my ex-wife's mother. It's Crapnarok.

econazi

Greenpeace or PETA activist. Almost always a rich vegetarian pothead. Long on implausible ideas, short on solutions that work for people that aren't rich, vegetarians, potheads, or all of the above.

"Is that leather armor? Get back here you cow murdering Viking!"

"Fuck off, econazi."

62👍 20👎

crapapalooza

An event or series of events so crap-laden that it transcends craptacular, craptastic, but falls short of crapnarok.

My bosses wouldn't let me off for medical appointments so I quit my job. My appointments found gallbladder disease. Now I'm going to have a hard time paying for the fucking surgery. This week's been a real crapapalooza.

3👍 6👎

backswamp

A place neither backwoods nor backwater, but a loathsome combination of the two. Often found in Florida. Often filled with conniving people who practice the art of deceit and backstabbery for the sheer pleasure of it. A place where it's impossible to find a job without knowing someone, and where all new people are taken advantage of by oxygen theives.

Most of Polk County, Florida is a backswamp. The rest of it is just dull.

8👍 3👎

blought

Past-tense word that indicates that either a blinging or a blighting was done. Since the two are often impossible to distinguish from one another, it is the perfect word.

How to derive this from common English:

Bring-Brought
Bling-Blought
Wright-Wrought
Blight-Blought

Man, this car has been blought.

5👍 9👎

scrooging it

Living beyond cheaply. Hoarding money to obscene extents. The art of being a penny-pinching coupon-clipping treasure-hoarding frugality nazi.

"I just quit my shitty job, so I'm scrooging it until I find something that sucks less."

4👍 4👎

Tampa

A Florida city surrounded by areas that suck. A shining beacon in the middle of backswamp hick counties full of oxygen thieves. A traffic nightmare like no other - correction, like everything else in this state. One of the few non-tourist-traps that our state has to offer to entertain residents. Also one of the most dangerous places in the US, and home to some of the least successful sports franchises in existance.

Polk County sucks, let's go to Tampa.

97👍 150👎