bless your heart

A term used prior to ridiculing, insulting the sensibilities of, or pointing out the shortcomings of someone. Used to soften the blow of a statement, and can render nearly any comment, no matter how brash or distasteful, socially acceptable.

Wife- Honey, do these jeans make me look fat?

Husband- Bless your heart, dear, but you've been a whale for the last ten years and I still can hardly believe you haven't imploded into a black hole due to the force of your gravity yet, so no matter what you wear, you'll still be a walking pork rind.

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