Title 9

A well-deserved lashing(physical or verbal) issued to a female.

This is not to be confused with wife-beating, spousal abuse or unwarranted attack. A "title IX" occurs when the actions of a violent or disrespectful female are reciprocated with the same reactions a man would have received.

Jerry: "Hey Steve, what the heck happened to your girlfriend's eye? She looks like she got dominated!"

Steve: "Oh yeah, she slapped me the other night during an argument so I issued her a title 9. She's not getting any sympathy from anyone(despite her best efforts) so I think she learned her lesson...."

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African American

A controversial and failing attempt to euphemize an identity phrase for Black Americans. Unfortunately for the phrase's potential to be literally correct, all humans came from Africa at one time, therefore all people, regardless of breed, color, ethnicity or however one may choose to categorize them, are of African descent. Another problem the more-educated population has with the phrase is that the quickest way to know which specific type of African American one is referring to is to look at their skin. This takes the subject of conversation back to black, eliminating the function of the euphemistic-intentioned phrase. Due to it's failure to positively convey the identity of the Black American without error, the phrase has evolved into a dysphemism and is often spoken between air quotes.

Correct: Aboriginal Australians are black, and many of African emmigrants are black, but African Americans range in color as far as human potential has seen.

Incorrect: Jesse Jackson is an African American but Richard Nixon is not.

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coathanger

A physically insignificant male. One who is just man enough to hold up a coat and occasionally open a car door, but who will inevitably find himself folded up in a trash can somewhere.

Stacy - "Hi Steve, it's good to see you, you look amazing!"

Steve - "It's great to see you! I'm sorry to hear about you and Mark, but I see you've started dating again. Who's the coathanger?"

Stacy - "Oh, just some fuddy-duddy I picked up along the way. He's actually my tax man. Honestly I don't even know why I am dating him, I guess I am just easing myself back into the dating world"

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Coat hanger

A physically insignificant male. One who is just man enough to hold up a coat and occasionally open a car door, but who will inevitably find himself folded up in a trash can somewhere.

Stacy - "Hi Steve, it's good to see you, you look amazing!"

Steve - "It's great to see you! I'm sorry to hear about you and Mark, but I see you've started dating again. Who's the coat hanger?"

Stacy - "Oh, just some fuddy-duddy I picked up along the way. He's actually my tax man. Honestly I don't even know why I am dating him, I guess I am just easing myself back into the dating world"

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Workic

A person who is addicted to work

Bob is an alcoholic and drinks all day but his brother Steve is a workic and spends his nights in the office.

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Buchannon Affair

An affair with a predetermined beginning and end, allowing a couple to grow as close as they want to during the affair without complicating their lives after the predetermined end.

The term was coined after the character Mitch Buchannon of the TV show Baywatch. Mitch needed to be presented as a romantic heartthrob capable of love, but one who, in order to keep the show interesting, could never be tied down. This forced writers to send all of his loves off to the other side of the world, whether for scientific research, caring for a dying parent or to "find themselves".

This allowed Mitch's heirum to transcend the superficial booty-call status but fall just short of marriage and permanence.

E- "Wow, Steve, do you have a girlfriend now?"

S- "No Eric, Why?"

E- "Who was that girl you were with the other night? You two looked like newlyweds, and you seemed so much more than eachother's bootycall"

S- "Oh, that was my Buchannon affair, Nikita. She has some important job in Russia and comes here for a few weeks once a year for recertification or something. Since we already know when she's leaving, it allows us to be as close as we want without worrying about anything too long term.

E- "Oh, like Mitch Buchannon, I get it..."

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Fruitopia

Any gay-friendly community or region.

Hawaiian laws on gay-marriage have made it quite a fruitopia.

There are few fruitopias as notorious as San Francisco.

The well-known fruitopia of West Hollywood,(AKA "boystown") was the first city in the US to enact a law banning cat-declawing.

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