disasterbation

The uncontrollable and critical urge to stimulate one's own genitals for sexual pleasure, often after an extended period of celibacy (e.g. long road trips spent in shared quarters with family members)

Alan: Hey, man, wanna go grab a few drinks at the pub tonight?

Brian: Sorry, I just got back from taking care of my grandmother for three weeks, and she has no Internet at her place... It's time for some SERIOUS disasterbation!

Alan: No problem, dude. See ya next week!

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