Assmitten

A derivative of Asshat. Where one has both hands up their ass instead of their head.

John: Why did you drop the hammer on my foot, you Assmitten.

Barry: I don't have hands up my ass!

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Secretary

The longest word one can type on a keyboard using only the left hand.

Try it!

Use your left hand only, and type
S E C R E T A R Y

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Steam loller

"laughing out loud" so hard steam comes off the top of your head

OMG that was so funny, i steam lollered!

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