Chandleritus

'Chandleritus' or 'Chandler Disease' Is a condition named after the Chandler character on the American sitcom 'Friends'. The effects of this incurable disease can be very severe. It is the need to make a joke out of everything that is happening, and having a serious attitude for only 3 minutes at a time. As a long term sufferer of this awful condition, I find it increasingly more and more difficult to keep a steady job, or to even pass the interview. So for as little as £3 a month, you can help ease the pain of this illness.

Me: On the way to this interview, I saw a guy who looked smarter dressed than me and I panicked a little, but he went the other way.
Interviewer: No, you look fine.
Me: Oooh hello, you look fine to you handsome devil. Sorry I have Chandleritus

Friend: My nan just died.
Me: Where there's a will...there's a way, congratulations. The drinks are on you I assume?
Friend: It's a good job I don't have Chandleritus, I need to write the eulogy.

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Truro

Truro is a city in Cornwall, which is in the south west of England. The city is often mockingly called a town for its tiny size. It is officially a city however as it contains a Cathedral (Big Church Thingy). People view this little place differently.
Some see it as a bleak mockery of a city, and wonder why the homeless would choose live there if they have the option of just dying.

Others see it as a tiny drop of paradise, an Oasis if you will, from the inbred, shotgun wielding, bearded farmers that prowl Cornwall in search for a virgin to sacrifice to the Wicker man....Don't worry they won't find a Virgin in Cornwall.

Hagrid looked out of the window of his Hut, and thought of Truro. "If they can avoid the debauchery and child molestation in a place like Cornwall, Maybe I should stop trying to fuck Harry"

Is that a Truro in your pocket?...Or do you just smell like Shit.

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