To start a conflict between other people just so you can watch. Can be between friends, between enemies, or between friends and enemies. Usually involves saying "he said she said you suck!" or some other much more colorful variant. Occasionally falls under the subtle art of interpreting a comment as incorrectly as is plausible.
Drew: "Why do you look so angry, Jordan?"
Akira: "I heard someone say the other day that Jordan doesn't like you, Drew."
Drew: "WHAT!"
Jordan: "Wait, I never said..."
Akira: "...Didn't you wonder where your milkshake went the other day, Jordan? Drew stole it."
Jordan: "WHAT!"
Akira: "That's cuz Drew thinks your haircut is ugly."
Jordan: "Oh really?!!"
Akira: "...And wants to challenge you to a duel."
Drew: "Whoa Akira, why are you trying to instigate?!"
140👍 27👎
A very permanent solution to Life's very temporary problems.
But these problems can seem or become permanent if we cannot see a way out of them. That's why telling people that they are selfish to want to commit suicide, is not truly addressing the issue. There are many reasons why people consider it, and blindly shooting them down is not helping anyone gain clarity on the matter. Please, try sitting down and listening to your friend, and if anything coming up with a plan on how to live! Happily and healthily! See if that works better. Suicide isn't necessarily an obsession with death, but rather with Life.
Molly committed suicide; she walked to the Golden Gate Bridge, jumped off that great height, and died as she landed in the water below.
26👍 36👎
To undo a "Fuck You" previously done unto someone else.
Office Mate #1: "Boss told me to tell you you're fired."
Office Mate #2: "Fuck you!!!"
Office Mate #1: "...But I told boss that unless he told you himself, he should consider you employed."
Office Mate #2: "Okay, I take it back... unfuck you."
27👍 2👎
the cat-loving, whip-wielding, jewelry-stealing, leather-wearing, ass-kicking hottie who alternates between having a romance with the Caped Crusader and trying to claw his pointy cowled head off. has a thing for roof-jumping in Gotham at night. without a net. has a sharp tongue and rather sharp claws. sometimes a reluctant antiheroine.
she and said Caped Crusader (Batman) have a knack for saving each other during their late-night rendezvouses... she is Batman's ultimate perfect match in a woman, even if they can never be together for good... Batman's mission and her life of crime get in the way of their life together without masks, though not in the way of their feelings for each other.
Her "real" identity is Selina Kyle. She is also known as The Cat (as opposed to The Bat).
Thugs: Hey, it's Catwoman! C'mere, kitty kitty!
Catwoman: Sorry, boys, no time to play.
Thugs (with rope): Aw, but we got your ball of string right here!
Catwoman: ...On second thought, maybe you boys need to take a little cat-nap.
*Catwoman beats them all up*
46👍 6👎
A polite way of saying, "Fuck you!"
Southern Belle #1: "Look at this ring my husband bought me!"
SB #2: "That's nice."
SB #3: "Look at this fur coat my husband just gave me!"
SB #2: "That's nice."
SB #1: "Why didn't your husband get you anything?"
SB #2: "Well ...he did send me to finishing school..."
SB #3: "Why'd he do that?"
SB #2: "...So I could learn to say THAT'S NICE instead of FUCK YOU!!!!" :)
65👍 23👎
Fictitious Agent 007 of the British Secret Service, lover of martinis that are shaken and not stirred, bedder and ditcher of fine women, speaker of shitty puns, licensed to kill. One of the world's most celebrated sociopaths.
Originally the main character in Ian Fleming's series; now a well-known decades-spanning series of movies, starring actors such as Sean Connery, Timothy Dalton, Pierce Brosnan, and Daniel Craig as 007.
See also "His Name Is James Bond", a hilarious viral video about what a douche he is.
Guy #1: "Hey, have you seen the new James Bond film?"
Guy #2: "Nah, man, Austin Powers does it better."
3👍 4👎
A South Park character almost as perverted as Chef. He is one of the four main boys, along with Stan, Kyle, and Cartman - Kenny is the residential poor kid, consistently clothed, concealed, and muffled by an orange parka, whose experience with sex is only surpassed by his experience with death.
Visible in select episodes without his orange parka - most notably in the movie. Has messy blond hair. The best-looking of the South Park boys. Voiced by Matt Stone.
Kenny McCormick: M mm mm! Mmm mffm mfmf mm m- MMM MMMF!
(I want her! Maybe I'll finger her and- OH NOOO!!!)
*Kenny is flattened by Mariah Carey's breasts*
Stan: Oh my God! She killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastard!!!
493👍 50👎