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Cockface McSmellass

not just your normal cockface, one who goes above and beyond the call of "duty" to bring new heights and new meaning to the insult of cockface. Examples include pissing AND vomiting on a friends couch when extremely intoxicated, fucking a friend's sister AND girlfriend within the same relative time period, and flunking out of two separate college's after having been awarded and athletic scholarship twice.

Dude 1: So you were pretty wasted last night?
Cockface McSmellass: Yup, pissed and vomited all over myself and Mike's couch.
Dude 1: Truly a Cockface McSmellass.

Yo dude you mind if I bang your sister??
Sorry man Cockface McSmellass over there already beat you to it.

Cockface McSmellass is at it again folks.

by Skidmark McGee March 14, 2007

25πŸ‘ 12πŸ‘Ž


Farty McPoopbottom

Basically as the word would imply, someone who has uncontrollable bodily functions in the area of flatulence and poopy stink. Someone who at any given time is known to release copious amounts of both stink farts and smelly poop, or both at the same time.

Farty McPoopbottom's usually tend to be somewhat overweight, but there are rare occasions when a normal size person may become a Farty McPoopbottom.

Guy 1: Man that movie was terrible.
Guy 2: Yeh seriously.
Guy 3: Hey did either one of you guys go in the bathroom at all? Smelled like Farty McPoopbottom in there.
Guy 2: Yeh it made me wana throw up it was so bad.
Guy 1: I didnt really think it smelled that bad.
Guy 3: Yeh well look at what your mom does to your home bathroom on a daily basis, no wonder it didnt smell that bad to you.
*Guy 1 punches Guy 3 in the face*

by Skidmark McGee August 24, 2007

14πŸ‘ 6πŸ‘Ž


Cant fight city hall


meaning its pointless to try and fight against whatever may be happening, be it losing a job, flunking a class, or breaking up with a girlfriend/boyfriend. Something
that is completely inevitable trying to fight against it happening is like taking on city hall, you will lose every time. City hall cant be beaten people, it just cant.

Guy 1: Wow so she broke up with you huh?
Guy 2: Yeh just broke the whole thing off, never really said why.
Guy: Think it was because your penis is so small?
Guy 1: Well mayby either way you cant fight city hall. Besides other women dont think that, take your mom for instance.
Guy 2: *punches Guy 1 in the face*

Worker 1: Son of a bitch! They changed policy again?!? I cant stand working here!
Worker 2: Yeh well what are you gonna do, you cant fight city hall.
Worker 1: Yeh your right, it could be worse at least my wife hasnt gained 20 lbs for every year we have been married, like your's has,...
Worker 2: *kicks worker 1 in the crotch as hard as he can*

Guy 1: Wow so she broke up with you huh?
Guy 2: Yeh just broke the whole thing off, never really said why.
Guy: Think it was because your penis is so small?
Guy 1: Well mayby either way you cant fight city hall. Besides other women dont think that, take your mom for instance.
Guy 2: *punches Guy 1 in the face*

Worker 1: Son of a bitch! They changed policy again?!? I cant stand working here!
Worker 2: Yeh well what are you gonna do, you cant fight city hall.
Worker 1: Yeh your right, it could be worse at least my wife hasnt gained 20 lbs for every year we have been married, like your's has,...
Worker 2: *kicks worker 1 in the crotch as hard as he can*

by Skidmark McGee February 7, 2007

15πŸ‘ 9πŸ‘Ž


grundelicious

the quite obvious combination of the two words grundel and delicious, grundelicious. meaning that the grundel that you have just sampled is just simply delicious, scrumptious, luscious, or other wise stupendously tasting. Grundelicious can also be used to describe any other productions of the anatomical region known as the grundel, including but not limited to grundel gravy, grundel cakes, grundel juice and grundel butter.

His grundel tasted delicious, it was truly a grundelicious treat.

Kid 1: Wow that grundel gravy your mom used at Thanksgiving was great, truly grundelicious just like she promised it would be! Is it a home recipe?
Kid 2: Yeh do you want my mom to write it down so your mom can make it next year?
Kid 3: You guys are fucking sick, I'm outta here.

Its all about the cocktapus.

by Skidmark McGee August 13, 2007

16πŸ‘ 7πŸ‘Ž


Girlfriend

something men feel that they need in their life, of course this is a mistake, men need food, water, shelter, not "girlfriend". when you do something wrong "girlfriend"
will be sure to remind you. "girlfriend" also makes sure to point out all the things "girlfriend" doesnt like (friends, sports, etc), things you dont do that "girlfriend" is
used to and emphasizing all that "girlfriend" does for you, amazingly all this is done while giving men the feeling that "girlfriend" puts up with alot more then
"girlfriends" friend's do.

"Girlfriend" also assumes men have endless supply of money.

Girlfriend: I wana go *insert name of stupid place here* !! Remember I went to that dumb movie with you last week.
Guy: Ok fine let's go. (thats funny I remember picking her up and paying for the tickets to the movie last week, I could have just gone with the guys and saved
money)

Girlfriend: I cant believe you did that, Diana's boyfriend never did anything like that to her !!
Guy: What did I do wrong??
Girlfriend: If you dont know I am not gonna tell you.
Guy: Please tell me whats wrong (how will I know if she doesnt tell me?)
Girlfriend: Nothing.
Guy: Just tell me.
Girlfriend: Nothing is wrong.
*Cycle repeats about a hundred times over*

by Skidmark McGee February 15, 2007

166πŸ‘ 141πŸ‘Ž


cocktapus

a very rare marine creature that instead of 8 long tenticles has 8 long cocks, each more than capable of performing in a variety of sexual situations.

This creature was labeled as extinct in the late 20th Century, but scientists have routinely observed it in it's natural habitat. Google it up, preferably while at work and with your supervisor(s)looking on, (it will show them how smart you are).

The cocktapus awoke this morning to find it almost drowned overnight in a sea of gism due to 8 consecutive wet dreams.

I brought my pet cocktapus into my urologist's office the other day and he passed out when he saw it.

What the hell?? Seriously what the hell is this???

by Skidmark McGee March 8, 2007

66πŸ‘ 20πŸ‘Ž


State Trooper

Your basic state trooper is very much like your basic cop, someone who had little to nothing going for them in life and at the risk of digging ditches or laying concrete the rest of their life they decided to become a cop. They are then given a few weeks of training after which they "graduate", being then given almost unlimited authority over common citizens and the power to carry a gun both on and off "duty" (duty = driving around issuing tickets and basically ruining anyone's day they choose). And yes I have had an actual real trooper/cop tell me how "cool" it is that he can carry a gun around. People like Louis H. are badly informed as to what cops are and do, and/or are cops themselves or directly related to a cop. People who become cops are people who are either amazingly egotistical or wish to get back at the world for whatever silly reason they perceive in their head, more often than not a combination of both.

To work a job where you go in every single day/night and ruin someone's day or life depending on what "citation" you give them or what you "arrest" them for all the while knowing that in your private life you "speed" while driving and occasionally drink with friends at a bar and then drive home is the epitomy of the basic definition of hypocrisy.

Never argue or fight against a trooper (or cop for that matter) but dont think for a second that these "people" are on your side or their to help you and protect as it explictly says in their oath "To Protect and Serve" The only thing they serve is their own power lust and ego and they will without a second thought ruin your life and more because they are "enforcing laws" they themselves dont pay attention to and dont adhere to in their private lives.

State Trooper 1: Man that was great arresting that guy for drinking and driving even though he was barely over the limit, he lost his job and everything.
State Trooper 2: Yeh we sure ruined his life, he will never cross us again.
Normal person in a bar (me): You guys are both drinking right now, and you drove here which means you are gonna drive home after drinking just like he was.
Troopers: Yeh but its different, were cops.
Me: Oh,...right,...that makes perfect sense.

Trooper: Man I got a great story about how I just busted all these kids I caught smoking weed. I think even a few got kicked out of college.
Me: Hmm, I remember in High School how you smoked out a few times.
Trooper: Yeh but thats different, Im a cop now.
Me: Oh right,...guess that means I shouldnt mention the hypocrisy of the whole situation.

Me: How did you get there so fast?
Trooper: I am a cop I just drove here at 110 mph the entire way. I even got pulled over but a little flash of the tin is all it took.
Me: Oh,...right...that makes sense to me.

by Skidmark McGee August 29, 2007

226πŸ‘ 305πŸ‘Ž