Ninjas on the lawn

Along with paranoia, ninjas-on-the-lawn is the most common side effect of cocaine.

asshole: "What is that outside?"

you: "I'm not sure, but i think it could be NINJAS."

asshole: "There are no ninjas on the lawn."

you: "OF COURSE THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK; THEY'RE NINJAS."