Iron Horse

The sexual act known as the Iron Horse is one for the brave.
You require the following:
- A naked Man
- A naked Woman
- A bed with a headboard / bars
- A decently long hallway
- A helmet

Steps to completion:
The naked man starts at the far end of the decently long hallway, hopefully already fairly excited. The naked woman positions herself on the bed grabbing onto the headboard / bars, on her hands and knees in the doggy-style position. She must also have put on the helmet, and is preferably already somewhat excited. Now, the man at the end of the decently long hallway should begin running down the hallway towards his waiting woman on the bed. At distance (male's judgment), the male jumps into the air screaming "Iron Horse" while attempting to land his wood into the waiting woman's vaginal cavity. Upon a successful completion of this act, the male has indeed landed his wood into the female's vaginal cavity and the female's head has been punched through the headboard as well as the wall behind the bed(should there be a wall there).

(Note: for males who wish to attempt such an act, the following advice is offered. Do not try this while drunk, perhaps your female should be. This is not recommended for the depth-perception impaired or those with otherwise horrible aim. Upon failure of this act, a trip to your local emergency room is strongly suggested.)

So I met this really kinky chick who kept going on about trying crazy sex acts. I told her about the Iron Horse...that was one hell of a trip to the Emergency Room. A guy with a crimpled dick and a chick's head covered in drywall...

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