Toaster

An appliance used to heat up bread, or a weapon, used to heat up the situation.

1. Hey Jim, could you put some bread in the toaster?
2. Hey Jim, if you don't get that bread by Friday, you're gonna get a toaster pulled on you.

fluid intake

Something Facebook moms/Soccer moms obsess over. A phrase for people who think you need eight glasses of water a day, when in reality, you should only be drinking when you're thirsty.

Mom: "Have you been keeping up with your fluid intake sweetie?"
Daughter: "I'm not thirsty"
Mom "THE POST SAID EIGHT GLASSES OF WATER A DAY YOU LITTLE BRAT"