douche master

Douche Master, otherwise know as Doucheronicus Americanus, or The Master of Douches. Most commonly found in Ohio or New Jersey, south of LA, or on the beach in California. a douche master can be usually found surrounded by many other douche-followers, who all think they are the greatest thing that ever happened to the human race, or is making fun of all his douche-followers, calling them douchebags, while failing to realize that he himself is the greatest douchebag that ever walked the face of this now cursed planet. This douche master alone increases the douchey-ness of his posse of douches, making everyone they walk by want to utterly destroy them in the face and give them a mortal kombat-esque death.
A douche master will most commonly be found wearing a small, pink, tight fitting ralph lauren polo, a pooka shell necklace', and about 3 quarts of hairgel. He usually has plastic Oakley's or $1,000 sterling silver and leather sunglasses which he enjoys talking about to everyone he walks by. He is usually caught wearing tight abercrombie jeans, because he thinks everyone wants to see his overly worked-out asscheeks.
Chad Kruger from Nickelback.
Usually owns an iPhone, and most likely has his background of a tan bodybuilder wearing a day-glow candy-thong, but insists he is not gay, saying he has it only as inspiration of what he wants to look like someday.

A douche master is most likely found traversing his "pussy pounding stomping ground" in a "sick 3series BMW, WITH Nav" that he drudgingly carts around his fellow douche mongers, whose sole purpose in life is to poison all who see them and/or socially interact with them. The Douche Master...is the loudest, most obnoxious, most obscene of all the douchebags he is with.
The usual symptoms of the Douche Master disease is the desperate need to have an abundance of expensive hair gel, and, in severe cases, hair spray. Common symptoms include swelling,munchies,headaches,fever,nauseousness,small penis, and a sudden desire for big muscles in a short time period. You will also have an aching desire to talk solely about with protein supplements and steroids.
Example:
A guy named Mike, a guy named Evan, and/or people from Ohio.
1: "hey, wanna know how to make a thousand bucks?"
2. "Sure, tell me how!"
1: "Suck a big cock!"
2: "Wow, you are definitely a Douche Master"
1: " Thanks DOOD!"
2: "...that wasnt a compliment..."
Guy 1:" dude, look at all those douchebags."
Guy 2:"Whoah! what the hell is THAT?!"
Guy 1:"Is that...no!"
Guy 2:"yes...it has to be"
Guy 1:"That is...the megadouche!"
Guy 2:"No...Its...The Douche Master!"
Guy 1: "RUN!!!!"
Guy 2: "RUN!!!!"

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