Carl

A guy who probably had his existential crisis that only the age of 16. He's the kind of guy who cries himself to sleep every night. If he has kids, He doesn't. His wife has them, Someone kidnapped them, Or some shit. Carl's get no kids. The only type of kids he gets is a class of angry teenagers who live off monster energy drinks. Carl's are usually teachers, why? because they hate their life so much so that they need to make it worse with every passing minute. By the age of five Carl's are usually alcoholics. You can't blame them. It's not their fault they were named Carl. Carl's also have a tendency to have very small penises. So small that a dwarf could top them. So small that it is impossible for a man like that to be straight. Carl's have small penises.

"oh hey that's Carl." "Doesn't he have a tiny penis?"

"Isn't that Carl's eighth wine bottle?"

"Someone help Carl he about to jump off the balcony again. "