Gravy SEAL

A gravy SEAL is a person either belonging to a militia group or has an unhealthy obsession with the military, guns, and anti-government views, but was never actually in the military due to either being grossly out of shape, mentally unfit, or just too dumb to function. Years of dead end jobs and poor diet have made white, middle aged men very upset. Some express that anger through squeezing into a paintball vest that sits just above their beer gut, and sit in the woods to shoot beer cans and talk about how they'll protect THE GREAT US of A from the evil hippies that love ISIS, hate Jesus, and probably have satanic rituals to sacrifice kids they keep held in a DC pizza shop.

Although a term of mockery, Gravy SEALs should be taken seriously, as they are deluded AND have access to copious amounts of arms, and plenty of just as delusional friends to back them up. They may be fat, unhealthy, conspiracy nuts, but they have real guns.

Tl;dr - military wannabe LARPers, but with actual guns.

Ex: I was going to eat lunch at Chapman park, but apparently the gravy SEALs have been deployed there for some rally.

Ex: Those guys are so spineless. They stamp and holler and threaten to send in their gravy SEALs, but then decide to cancel and whimper about it being unsafe.

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