Random
Source Code
Random
1. a tool typically used for chopping wood, usually a steel blade attached at a right angle to a wooden handle.
2. How black people who downvote urbandictionary posts that call them out pronounce âaskâ despite English professors, doctors, and people whoâs native language is English telling them that itâs pronounced âaskâ.
Can I axe you something?
âThat sounds dangerous, please leave my kids and I alone!!!â
1👍 7👎
A hand towel (20âx40â) is folded in half lengthwise (to become 10âx40â) and placed on a flat surface. A latex glove is then placed on the towel, perpendicular to the long end, slightly extending ~1â past the end. The towel is then rolled up completely around the glove. The extending 1â of the glove is then peeled back around the rolled up towel and secured with elastics to secure in place. Lube is then added to the interior of the glove and then spend 10 minutes deciding which porn flick to yank off too.
Whatâs this thing beside your bed?
Mom, thatâs my Forever Alone Satisfier.
â¦your what?
Just look it up on Urban Dictionary and then leave please. Ima use it
3👍 19👎
A jackass who deletes your words on urban dictionary after a couple months even though they were valid and racking up lots of likes.
4👍 10👎
The female way of saying âplease fuck meâ.
What do you want to do tonight?
I want you to fucking whisk my eggs :)
HA. OK!!!
10👍 15👎
A letter that people from Britain think is pronounced âuhhâ
âYes we Uhh hereâ
You mean we are here
1👍 6👎
The type of blowjob that diagnoses you with Post Nut Propofol/Post Nut Paralysis for 10 or more minutes. Typically completed with an empty urethra as she completes it by using your dick like a straw. You will probably need to put your penis in a wheelchair afterwards, if and when you can move again. Contraceptives probably wonât be needed for the next 6 months as your sperm count will drop to -5,000. Thatâs right. Negative. Your nuts will owe themselves 5,000 new sperm cells.
How was it with the wife last night?
âBroooo I swear to fuck she gave me a full on Super Ultra Golden Nut Bustin Mega Ultra Gawk Gawk Gawk 5000XL+â
Daammmmn how are you able to walk right now???
10👍 17👎
My life is officially over and it was nice knowing everyone. Please donât cry at my wedding/funeral. Bury me in satin and here is the song I want you to play at my wedding/funeral. Please remember me. I love you all.
She said yes!!!
The Bros: *start tearing up*
5👍 10👎