Foley fumble

The Foley fumble is a two-part maneuver: While standing at the foot of the bed, having sex with a spread-eagle internet hook-up, you accidentally lose control of your bowels and drop a deuce on her bedroom floor. To correct this mistake, you quickly kick it under her bed before she can notice. You continue pumping away until you’re finished, then go home, leaving the log for her to find the next morning.

This move was pioneered by Christopher “Kidd Chris” Foley, popular radio show host.

Other names for this maneuver include the Syracuse Sneak, Sacramento Surprise, Loveland Log Roll, and Portland Pump & Dump.

Wayne: “Last night I met this robust woman off AOL, and in the middle of giving it to her I pulled a Foley fumble.”
Lenny:”What in the blazing blue hell is that?!”
Wayne:”I shat on the floor, then kicked it under the bed. She never knew!”
Lenny:” So it’s like a fumble in the NFL, but in this case, you don’t want to end up with the brown object in the end.”

Ghost Eagle

Ghost Eagle was a large supernatural entity that haunted cabins in the West Coast of the US in the 80s and 90s. The most popular ghost eagle sightings had the spirit protecting hallways and refrigerators at night time.

Named because it took the form of a bald eagle, it stood as high as a grown man and was very imposing. Legend has it, it was summoned by the Dudley family to keep their kids in bed at night, and prevent them from midnight snacking, when they vacationed.

Although never confirmed, rumors were he disliked Asians and that coming in contact with ghost eagle caused polio.

I’m scared of ghost eagle, Miss Dudley. I’m scared of ghost eagle please stop scaring Japanese.

steady diet of rabbit

If you’re on a “steady diet of rabbit”, it means you’re having tons of sex, aka screwing like rabbits.

Girl: “Judy seems different lately, she’s always so happy.”
Guy: “Oh that’s cause she’s been in a steady diet of rabbit ever since her and Joe got together.”

Orion’s Belt

When a woman’s breasts hang so low that her nipples line up with her belly button, thus resembling the Orion’s Belt constellation.

“Oh my god, look at Alyssa’s massive mammories! They’re dangling so low it looks like three dots in a row, just like Orion’s Belt!

1👍 1👎

Pink selfie

A selfie taken of a girl's vagina, or pink parts, as some may know them.

I called into the Kidd Chris show and he asked me to send him a pink selfie.

Confused Groundhog

When you have your girl get on all fours and put a pie pan under each part that touches the floor. Then start pumping away. Every time you thrust, she’ll slide forward. That coupled with her ecstasy will make her look like a confused groundhog foraging for a nut.

Rich: “Tina and I got the pie pans out last night and I slid her all around the floor with my back shots.”
Curtis:”The ol’ Confused Groundhog…that’s hot!”