9 Hours Pregnant

A state in which you need to poo really, really bad to the point where a large turd is turtle-heading or about to exit on it's own; Often occurs soon after waking up or after a big meal; Also occurs approximately 9 - 10 hours after large feasts and may be occur prematurely when preceded by meals high in fiber.

NOTE: May be accompanied by contractions and a dilated anus.

Dude, if I don't take a shit soon I'm going to be in trouble because I'm 9 hours pregnant!

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The Ribbon Dancer

When a male wiggles his penis while ejaculating so rather than coming out in a straight line, the semen is expelled in a squiggly fashion. Commonly used when cumming onto a girl's face to sneak it into her hair or eyes.

She kept telling me to cum on her so I gave her the ribbon dancer.

I was quite proud when I went from a houdini into ribbon dancer into a sad clown into a mushroom stamp.

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