Random
Source Code
Random
When someone says something so goddamned stupid that you cut your own cock off just to slap them with it.
If you are impotent anyway, give yourself a vasectomy Van Gogh to shut that stupid bitch up.
While someone is wearing a free diving mask, the act of gently inserting the snorkel in to your asshole and shitting down the tube.
I had my mask on and was putting on my swimfins when suddenly the skipper gave me a polish depth charge. I nearly choked to death.
When you suck a fart out of a willing participant's asshole and vurp the fart/vomit combo in to your targets face
That asshole at the hockey game wouldn't shut up so my girlfriend and I gave him a Brazilian Blowdart.
The act of a man deficating into a persons mouth then proceeding to have sex with said mouth with said feces still in it.
As seen on Sonic commercial: "and this one is called the Kentucky show boat."
"He wanted to give me a Kentucky show boat and I said yes because I thought he was offering me jumbo popcorn chicken."
25👍 3👎
When you pass out drunk in the tub and shit yourself.
I woke up thinking I was being cooked in a giant tub of watered down chili and then realized I shit the tub after I passed out. It smelled awful and burned in my orifices like I was taking a bath in the Devil's Bathtub.
When two women in a homosexual relationship have sex with an older man to offload their mutually repressed daddy issues.
Dude 1: âI canât believe those two lesbians had sex with that old creepy guy.â
Dude 2: âa lesbian would want to have sex with a guy about as much as you would Ricky, itâs called, bisexual.â
Dude 3: âWhatever man, thatâs a Cottonwood Eric, if Iâve ever seen one. Those bitches just really hated their dads and needed to get it out their system.â
Discovering something you thought was cool really isn't.
A bait and switch.
Shenanigans.
The ol' switcheroo.
Accidental sex with a passable transvestite.
"Man I took this gorgeous broad home and took her up the butt only to discover afterword that she had a dick."
"Did you hear that Snoop Dogg just changed his name to Snoop Lion?"
44👍 21👎