Random
Source Code

burtation

A heightened state of anticipation (characterized as 'heavy'), especially before an awards presentation.

Coined by CBS LA Reporter Serene Branson, prior to The Grammys, on 13 Feb, 2010.

Well, a very, very heavay, uh heavy duweh...uh burtation tonight. We had a very darriss, darrision...but let's go ahead, terris taison dos cablit the had lapet.

by ToddUncommon February 14, 2011

105πŸ‘ 29πŸ‘Ž


Sniper's Delight

Someone with a huge forehead - therefore making them a perfect target for a sniper.

See also: sniper's dream

"Nice shot, Max. That was over 3,000 meters!"
"Thank's bud. No big deal. It was easy, that target's huge melon was a real sniper's delight."

by ToddUncommon March 15, 2020


Boomer Flu

The fully contracted flu illness brought on by exposure to coronavirus COVID-19. Since the most vulnerable people to the virus are the old, fat, and unwell, that puts Baby Boomers squarely in the cross-hairs of the pandemic. The disease is lethal to about 2% of all victims, but is lethal to at least 5% of any loser born before 1960, and higher if you have heart disease, high blood pressure, diabeetus, asthma, gout, goiters, conservative politics, or general stupidity. See also: Trump Flu

"I think nana may have come down with the Boomer Flu!"
"Why?"
"She's super sick, and she just got back from her Asian cruise and brought back all this dirty paper money!"

by ToddUncommon March 10, 2020

207πŸ‘ 65πŸ‘Ž


ONAN

Stands for One Network America News network. Sometimes mistakenly referred to OAN, ONAN is a small-time, mom's basement "news" operation. Shows are typically hosted by distended colons and strung-out gap-toothed cam girls. Owned by Gil "Red" Herring, their only real claim to fame is the manufacture and marketing of matching sets of presidential knee pads and butt snorkels.

"Did you see that 'reporter' from ONAN at the federal conronavirus briefing? What do you think will happen first--she finally gets her adult teeth, or she promotes out of fifth grade this year?"

by ToddUncommon April 8, 2020

37πŸ‘ 4πŸ‘Ž


Ron DeathSentence

Ron DeathSentence is sometimes known as Ron DeSantis, the squinty-eyed, failed toilet brush salesman who became governor of Florida. Characterized by a desire to both go full douche and probe his own anus for signs of intelligence, he refuses to breathe the same air as his constituents, as he burns through his voters like logs on a campfire.

Ron DeathSentence enjoys killing his own citizens with anti-mask, anti-vaccine, and anti-intelligence policies with equal measures of arrogance and cowardice.

by ToddUncommon September 3, 2021

54πŸ‘ 7πŸ‘Ž


Butt Rations

The process by which people now use less than 20% of their normal toilet paper when wiping their ass. Toilet paper is worth more than gold (by weight) during this coronavirus COVID-19 pandemic.

"I'm going through serious butt rations right now. I'm now down to two squares per trip, and soon, I'll have to resort to Kleenex. Then napkins. Then paper towel. Then socks. Then sandpaper. Then tree bark. Then my hand. Then my other hand. And then I die."

by ToddUncommon March 22, 2020

36πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


silly o'clock

A time of morning (or night), usually between 3AM - 6AM in the local time zone that requires a person to interrupt normal sleep or waking patterns for often dubious reasons. Often used in reference to extremely early arrivals to airports, or to join business teleconference sessions with participants in multiple time zones. Also see stupid o'clock.

"I don't look so good because I had to be at work at silly o'clock this morning to join a videocon with our development office in Greece."

by ToddUncommon September 12, 2008

91πŸ‘ 9πŸ‘Ž