Simmophobia

A fear of free-throws. Not to be confused with Benphobia, which is a fear of jumpshots.

Mike: You see that nigga Giannis getting hit with two 10 second violations last night?

Joe: Yeah, dude’s got a bad case of Simmophobia.

Threadschmidting

When you offer to purchase something from someone for far less than it is actually worth (usually in a very underhanded or deceitful way).

Alex offered me $200 for my $1000 bottle of bourbon, but I was wise to his threadschmidting ways.

Alex: “How about I buy that bottle off you for $250”.
Joe: “Man, you know it’s worth $1,000”
Alex: “But the wax is scratched”
Joe: “Quit threadschmidting with your scrawny ass.”

Taken to the MacLeaners

Getting ripped off so badly on something that you feel physical pain in your rectum.

Kevin: How much for that bottle of bourbon?

Matt: $5,000

Kevin: Ouch, I feel like I’m being taken to the MacLeaners. That bottle is worth $1,000 max.