condom mile

The desperate half-mile sprint a man makes to a local convenience store when he desperately wants sex, has a partner, but isn't willing to risk spawning a crotch goblin. Upon arriving back with condoms, the Condom Mile is complete

Sarah: "Y'know, I was really disappointed I couldn't sleep with Richie at that party last night..."
Jessica: "You should've just had him make the Condom Mile."