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So, the Greeks took over Israel and they were like, "YO, COME JOIN OUR RELIGION!" and Judah and his group be like, "You can't make us," and they continued on their Jewish way. The problem is, the Greeks would NOT STOP FREAKIN PESTERING THEM, and Judah was like, "I can't anymore, whaddaya say we fight them!?" And the boys were like, "You know what's up!" The group (called the Maccabeesð) fought the Greeks as hard as they could. The problem was, the Jews back home barely had enough oil to light the menorah (there were no lightbulbs back then), and they only had enough for one day, and so the Jews were like, "Screw it, we need that light!" and lit the menorah, but when they woke up the menorah was still lit, and they were like, "Huh, that's weird." And the next day the menorah was still lit, and the Jews were like, "Okay, what is happening?" This also happened on the third day, and then the Jews were like, "WTF!?" This continued until the eighth night, which was also when the Maccabeesð took back their freedom and their temple (which was also raped by the Greeks), and they were finally able to eat their latkes in peace.
Quote:
Person 1: "And that's the Hanukkah story."
Person 2: "Booorrrriiinnggg!"
*Person 1 whacks Person 2 with frying pan*
Person 1: "GET LATKE'D"
(n.) A mischievious little creature that likes to throw out people's bread and grains and burn it, and they get especially rampant during Passover. Occasionally, they'll even hide your matzah if you aren't paying attention. If you ever spot a chametz imp, don't chase them. Just let them do their thing. Eventually they'll get bored and leave. But they never leave for too long, they always come back in around a couple weeks. Chametz imps look like little cubes with the flag of Israel on them.
"That darn chametz imp burned my bread! I was going to eat some toast!"
"It's Passover, dude."
"Oh..."
(cat.) One of the ten Leading Roles of the Prime beings. The Light Role has the power to glow a soft and warm glow, much like a candle. They are born around Hanukkah. But those who are lucky enough to be born on Hanukkah on a leap year, a rare birthday to have, also have the ability to be physically warm to the touch, just like a candle. The job of the Light Role is to help out when someone is lost in the dark, literally or mentally.
"And the person chosen to be the Light Role is... Vanca! Your job is to bring light to our planet."
"Thank you, sir."
(n.) A variant of a human that lives in another universe, one that is much more advanced than our lowly and discriminatory society. This leads to all Prime Beings being much more polite than humans. They also have ten "Leading Roles", who have special powers that keep their planet, Haria, in check.
The ten Leading Roles are Light, Wonder, Peace, Love, Inclusion, Acceptance, Joy, Loyalty, Wisdom, and Patience. Ten new Leading Roles are chosen every year.
Person 1: Have you heard the rumors?
Person 2: What rumors?
Person 1: Ara is suspected to be a Prime Being.
Person 2: OMG!
The art of spinning something around in your hand without dropping it, passing it between both hands.
"So what are some of your skills that can benefit our company?"
"I am a master at twirling."
(n.) They are little balls with different flags on them. You know it's a countryball if it's only about as tall as your knees. They get around by bouncing, and they don't have mouths. Their eyes are usually white circles. Some countryballs, ironically, are not balls. It depends on what countryball it is. For example, Singapore is a triangle, Israel is a cube, Kazakhstan is a brick, and the Reichtangle is a rectangle. (If you see the Reichtangle, run like there's no tomorrow, and don't stop until you know you're safe.) Countryballs are typically incorporated in art, but if you come across a countryball in real life, approach with caution. Keep in mind that a countryball will act differently depending on which countryball it is and its relationship with your country.
Person 1: Do you like countryballs?
Person 2: What are countryballs?
Person 1: *GASP*