octuplets

In America, a completely perfect reason to get a ton of presents, gifts, media coverage and other frivolous shit absolutely free. See meal ticket.

Congratulations on having a functional ovular system! Allow me and the rest of our idiotic media and brain-dead legions to shower you with a big-screen television, a gigantic cake that you'll probably just throw away, a bounty of clothes and three new cars! Your ability to squirt out octuplets with the assistance of a lab and numerous injections is a valuable asset to American society! In no way are you fucking up the gene pool or our future with children that you have no time to pay individual attention to!

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Squeezing Pigeons

A massive quantity of fecal matter on your vehicle, as if someone has maliciously captured pigeons and and forced them to defecate by squeezing them onto your car.

I was so foolish to park under a tree; it looks as if somebody's been squeezing pigeons all over it.

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The women's restroom is over there

An annoying phrase used by homophobes to pick at guys with long hair in the restroom.

Usually results in the long-haired individual's silent oath to attack the next person who says it.

Exactly why these people see fit to do such a thing is beyond this writer; perhaps it is because women at the clubs and parties these individuals inhabit tend to pay a little more attention to a man who has flowing well-kept blond hair in opposition to a 5'2" mongoloid who is trying to look like Mark Mcgrath and failing miserably.

(Enter long-haired guy, stage left)
Spiked-up douchebag: Hark, young knave! The women's restroom is over there, thou faggot! Hur hur!

(soliloquy) Long-haired guy: Mark me this night, O fates, for the next man that makes that lame joke is getting kneed in the junk!

(exit Spiked-up douchebag as Long-haired guy begins to pee.)

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