Mr Derbyshire

Mr Derbyshire, AKA ‘Derby’ is a veteran headmaster as well as an experienced assembly organiser. Derby is a cheeky old man who has an uncanny resemblance to the TV character ‘Mr Bean’. Derby is rarely seen around the school premises and remains an isolated figure from the rest of the school staff team. However, Derby truly shines when the yearly teacher karaoke show goes on towards the end of the school year. During this show Derby shows his musical talents and leaves the school pupils bowing down at his feet with the sheer beauty of his voice. Another time of the year when Mr Derbyshire shines is when the school sports day takes place. During this memorable day Derby shows of with various poses in his Gucci suit.
- Mr Derbyshire is also referred to as ‘mein führer’ by the school students.

Mrs Brown: David! I’m in a bit of a pickle organising the year 11’s assembly for tomorrow. I thought I’d come to you for help, I’ve got nothing.

Mr Derbyshire: It’s not a problem Laura! I’ve got some religious shit that I’ll show them year 11’s for the assembly. They don’t listen to our assemblies anyway - they’re more interested in this Snapchat thing that’s popular at the moment.

Mrs Brown: Thankyou David! You’re such a great assembly organiser and headmaster. I wish every headmaster could be such a Mr Derbyshire.

Mr Hopwood

Mr Hopwood, AKA ‘Hopwood’ is a veteran teacher who teaches History. Hopwood is a small and fierce man who’d pick a fight with anybody - whether that’s a student or teacher. Although Hopwood may seem nasty at first, he has the best interest at heart. As long as you do your homework and don’t interupt his History sessions, you will get on with the Hopwood just fine. Hopwood is the master of the Weimar Republic period in the Nazi Germany topic. Hopwood is also a semi-professional boxer and is feared in schools all across England.

Student A: I haven’t got my History homework to give to you today, I left it on the side.

Mr Hopwood: Well it’s the same old with you, listen. If you want to go and fail your History exam then go ahead. You’ll regret not bothering to do your homework and being such a smart-ass!

Student B: (whispering to Student A) He needs to calm down, he’s always got to be such a Mr Hopwood about things.

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