Autoeroticism

Self stimulation. Having a date with Mrs. Palmer and her 5 slut daughters, Auditioning the hand puppet, Badgering the witness, Bashing the bishop, Beating the shit out of your incapacitated midget, Beating the snotty end of my fuck stick, Blueball baseball, Calling down for more Mayo, Calling in the National Guard to assist you in a strategic crisis, Caping the crusader, Cheating on your other hand, Checking the plumbing, Choking the chicken, Tossing off, Trolling for the one-eyed walleye, Performing the tube sock tango, Wanking the white, Warming up the altar boy's dinner, White-water wristing etc. etc.

I've got nothing better to do with my time so I practice autoeroticism for hours on end.

40👍 8👎