GOM

'GOM' (girl over mates) is a noun that refers to a man who places the needs and requirements of his chosen female (girlfriend, f*ck buddy, wife etc.) before those of his friends. The term, in almost 100% of cases, is used in derogatory terms and is an insult of the highest order. Denying the pertaining to being a 'GOM' however is nigh-on impossible and is most often begrudgingly admitted and indeed adopted by the offender.

'GOMming', the accompanying verb to 'GOM', is the practice of spending time with said female. Originally, the term 'GOMming' was only used (again in inflammatory fashion) whence the 'GOM' in question was sacrificing spare time to entertain his ladyfriend in place of his friends. The term has since transgressed, and any time spent with a female, whether in place of time with his friends or not, is considered 'GOMming'.

In recent times, the terms 'GOM' and 'GOMming', due to their offensive magnitude, have become ongoing slurs towards those not currently offending but with a history of doing so. Scholars now maintain that being a 'GOM' or indeed 'GOMming' are not individual occurrences or practices, more a 'mindset, attitude, and a way of life'. The term is incredibly difficult to shake and has is known to cause sever psychological damage to those sullied by it's use.

Other uses include: GOM off, GOMming 'ell, GOMtastic, il GOMmeri (Italian), and GOMpig (used in only the most extreme circumstances).

Example 1:
Mattheu: "Chris are you out tonight"?
Chris: "Sorry Mattieu, I'm GOMming tonight".
Mattieu: "You fu*king waste. Lads! Chris can't come out tonight because he's GOMming".
Chris: "I'm out tomorrow night mate! The gf is on at the moment, gotta keep her sweet".
Mattieu: "I hope you catch clap you cretin".

Example 2:

Fred: "Wubble when on God's green Earth can we hang out?".
Wubble: "Soon my good man; I have been incredibly busy with work and my new football team".
Fred: "Any danger of you not GOMming for one minute?".
Wubble: "I'm not GOMming; Fred I've been single for nearly a year!".
Fred: "Once a GOM, always a GOM. You sicken me".

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Liverpool Syndrome

A person's belief that their previously successful football club is still universally revered and feared, despite a dearth of competitive success in the last two to three decades. Most applicable to clubs that have been managed by Kenny Dalglish (see Liverpool FC, Glasgow Celtic, Blackburn Rovers et al.).

Scott: Dave, where do you think Liverpool will finish this season?
Dave: I think we'll be challenging for the title, so long as Stevie and Luis stay fit.
Scott: You do realise that Liverpool are currently 12th in the table have won just twice in 10 games?
Dave: Yeah but we're a massive club and the manager will turn it round.
Scott: Dave you are being quite deluded; I think you may have Liverpool Syndrome.
Dave: Not so, Liverpool are the biggest club in the world and everyone's favourite song is 'You'll Never Walk Alone'.

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