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Neighbor

To force-feed a kid some grass, make him chew the dog shit off your lawn while you penetrate them anally, strip him naked in your home, and try to suck his dick with a vacuum cleaner. If his dick is ripped off within five seconds, rape him again and fire a gun next to his ear until he goes deaf. Make him down every bottle of alcohol you have and penetrate him in his eye sockets as hard as possible. Finish the act off by shoving him in a toilet and throwing shit at him while yelling slurs and insults (not that he'll hear them). Make him eat the shit afterwards, ejaculate and vomit in his mouth and on his face, shove Diet Coke and Mentos up his ass, and have everything on camera.

Neighbor your neighbors' kids for some free porn.

by Yopmail User July 3, 2023

16πŸ‘ 19πŸ‘Ž


Garbage

Take a good look in the mirror if you want the definition.

The fact that you've never been visited by even one garbage truck surprises me.

by Yopmail User November 19, 2022

30πŸ‘ 6πŸ‘Ž


get out of the pot

To wake the fuck up and get used to the harsh reality of the real world.

The term is derived from the visual novel Froggy Pot in which you have to convince this depressed dude named Froggy to get out of a pot of water to which heat is being constantly added. Pulling this off is lots more difficult than meets the eye.

Do yourself a favor and get out of the pot instead of wasting time pleasing the plumbers on the internet.

by Yopmail User October 30, 2022

7πŸ‘ 2πŸ‘Ž


Printing Press

This sex act requires that you abduct three little girls and strip them naked in your basement. You must then break their knees with a sledgehammer, toss the girls aside, create a mixture of laxatives and your bodily fluids (especially cum and vomit), and let it blend for ten minutes. During these ten minutes, you are to stand a few meters from your desired girl, charge towards her, ram your cock (you can use a spiked dildo, albeit not necessary) up her ass (cunts and mouths are acceptable), and repeat for each girl until the blending finishes. Feed one of the girls your concoction and, with a staple gun, connect the girls' mouths to each other's asses so that they form an endless human centipede. After some time, collect some of their shit and use it to spell out a phrase of your choice. Smear the shit on their faces afterwards and beat off on their backs and faces.

Vomit on a printing press for bonus points.

by Yopmail User August 28, 2023

3πŸ‘ 4πŸ‘Ž


The Emoji Movie

If you, by some miracle, are actually thinking of watching this school shooting of a "movie," please dial the Suicide Hotline: 1-800-555-9999. Watching it is, to say the least, an incredibly painful way to fucking die. And to those of you who have watched it, I wish you'd known how much you'd be missed before then.

The Emoji Movie makes the Holocaust look fucking hilarious.

by Yopmail User April 10, 2023

8πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


Satan

A very common misspelling of Santa. Such mistakes are often made by small children writing letters to infamous child molester Santa Claus during the holiday season.

Your gay-ass spelling costs Satan hundreds of millions of dollars a year due to the retarded flying reindeer allegations they cause. Thanks a lot, dipshits.

by Yopmail User August 28, 2022

60πŸ‘ 9πŸ‘Ž


Avatar: The Way of Water

-This shit happens more than ten years after the fucking prequel.
-Humans invade Pandora.
-The dead guy named Miles Quaritch turns out to be blue and alive.

-Jake's kids get kidnapped and freed (Spider being an exception).
-Jake and his family move to the fucking ocean.
-Lo'ak (Jake's son) fights some dude and almost gets fucking eaten by a predator.
-A tulkun named Payakan saves him (he's ostracized because he fought with the dudes who killed his mother).
-Kiri has a seizure. She lives because muh plot armor.
-Quaritch massacres the fucking tulkuns. Their brains prevent aging.
-Jake and his family get trapped in a sunken vessel (Payakan attacks it and kills the crew earlier).
-Lo'ak, Tsireya (Metkayina princess), and Tuk (Jack's daughter) get captured and live.
-Neteyam (Jake's son) dies. The other kids live.
-Quaritch holds Kiri (Jake's daughter) hostage until Neytiri (Jake's wife) cuts Spider's chest with a knife.
-Spider saves Quaritch and fucking stays on Pandora.
-Jake and his family stay underwater.

Avatar: The Way of Water sucks ass. Read these spoilers instead.

by Yopmail User December 18, 2022

7πŸ‘ 12πŸ‘Ž