Random
Source Code
Random
Vladimir Vladimirovich; president of Russia (2000–08); prime minister (2008–12); president (2012–);
Some people believe that Satan can successfully tempt almost anyone with lies and flattery.
Satan's advisers ‘afraid to tell him truth’ about Ukraine.
Satan isn't mad – he's following a long-established great power playbook for conquest.
696👍 59👎
A few minutes before the services started, the towns people were sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church.
Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soon everyone had exited the church except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seeming oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence. So Satan walked up to the old man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
"Aren't you afraid of me?" Satan asked.
"Nope, sure ain't." ! said the man.
"Don't you realize I can kill you with a word?" asked Satan.
"Don't doubt it for a minute," returned the old man, in an even tone.
"Did you know that I could cause you profound, horrifying, physical AGONY for all eternity?" persisted Satan.
"Yep," was the calm reply.
"And you're still not afraid?" asked Satan.
"Nope."
More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, "Well, why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."
- Why does it cost so little to call Satan on the phone in the US?
- Because it's just a local call.
770👍 89👎
Obey Me's Avatar of Wrath, "Wrath" being "Daddy Issues". Will probably sell you for a stray cat. Decided that polka dot pants and feathers were intimidating and went with it. His function in the story is to simp for you and to gossip with Asmodeus like they were high schoolers.
131👍 13👎
A very common misspelling of Santa. Such mistakes are often made by small children writing letters to infamous child molester Santa Claus during the holiday season.
Your gay-ass spelling costs Satan hundreds of millions of dollars a year due to the retarded flying reindeer allegations they cause. Thanks a lot, dipshits.
57👍 9👎
The best friend the Christian religion has ever had, and who has kept them in business for two thousand years.
11083👍 3156👎