Spruce Grove

A crap hole of a town. Filled with tons of trailer parks and convicted rapists. 20 minutes away from Alberta's capital Edmonton, it's only claim to fame is the "Tri Leisure Centre", which was set up to prevent the already growing population from getting any larger. It's once-a-year fun time is a crappy little carnival set up in the parking lot of the Safeway. Town attractions include the bountiful supply of meth addicts and the always accessible ecstasy, weed, and beer for minors. Also memorable due to it's shitty gymnastics club, Aerial's, which is so old that they can't even afford to heat it properly because it's not worth it, and whose owners want to spend a whopping 6 million dollars of tax payers money to build a brand new building, just for them. Also cluttered with some really stunning schools; Woodhaven, a school for the academically challenged, Greystone, known for it overwhelming record of drug busts, and let's not forget the beloved Spruce Grove Composite High School, which is so old that nearly everyone in town is terrified that it's going to collapse on any given day, so torn up and wrecked that no one likes going to school there, and even the teachers hate it. Even better, some of the school policies include an insanely strict dress code, and a rule that there are absolutely no cell-phones allowed.

1. "Let's go check out that school, what was it called again?" "That's Spruce Grove Composite High School, careful, all the students are drunk" *wasted student walks out in front of car "Told you so."
2. "This town is so quaint, let's stop and..." "NO. Someone will be trying to sell you drugs within seconds."
3. "Let's go hang out at my place." "Aww, do we have to go help your brother cook his meth again?"

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