King for a day

To have a severe case of diarhoea and thus spend a long time on the porcelain throne.

Pete: Dave, why weren't you in work yesterday?
Dave: Sorry mate, had a proper strong vindaloo on Sunday. So I had to be king for a day.

19👍 16👎

Birthday poo

A clean break after dropping anchor in poo bay, thus negating the need to wipe one's arse.

Pete: There's no need for a new bog roll yet, Dave.
Dave: How so?
Pete: Just had me a birthday poo!
Dave: Congratulations!

17👍 5👎