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human

A particularly noisy and destructive type of talking primate, having long since forgotten its place in the scheme of things, which is currently set about the task of permanently altering the biosphere of Earth in order to render it incapable of supporting life.

This talking primate alone suffers from a debilitating kind of self-reinforcing gullibility and delusion that results in an almost immovable self-importance and dualism. This condition causes humans to over-populate, over-consume and render their own environment uninhabitable.

It is theorised that humans, so afflicted, are attempting to self-soothe their collective unhappiness by committing mass suicide. Two such attempts are recorded in their recent history. Success in this effort would secure the place of humans in the category of "evolutionary cul-de-sac."

A small minority of humans exist in varying states of liberation from this delusional state. However, said minority is generally ignored by the larger civilization.

If you're annoyed by this definition, it's because you're a human.

by Zontar the Destructor February 28, 2004

543👍 123👎


civilization

1. Modern society and its conveniences.

2. An abstraction developed by human beings which falsely assumes that the cumulative result of all collective actions engaged in by a majority of said humans actually means something.

If this is civilization, then I'll go live in the woods.

by Zontar the Destructor February 28, 2004

66👍 35👎


primate

Any of the order Primates, which includes the monkeys, apes, and humans.

Also, an unfortunate bit of slang referring to humans of mainly African ancestry.

The Bonobo chimp is a primate.

by Zontar the Destructor March 26, 2004

47👍 22👎


JHVH1

Space god, will return to consume the earth when J.R. "Bob" Dobb's credit runs out.

Look out! It's JHVH1!

by Zontar the Destructor March 26, 2004

14👍 6👎