A possibly world-record shattering turd that measures from end to end, at the very least, 12 inches.
Samantha: "Why were you laughing so hard in the bathroom?"
Barbara: "Holy shit, bitch. I just made a filthy footlong in there. I haven't flushed it yet - you wanna see?"
Samantha: "Hell no, that's disgusting! By the way, why the fuck is your name Barbara?"