Chris' Ass

a very large piece of art, beautiful to the eye, and possibly even more enjoyable to the touch. looks simply majestic in yoga pants. has been featured in countless raunchy magazines in their fold out sections. thought to be many notable artists', sculptors', and play-writers' muse. the actual size of chris' ass has been debated amongst several esteemed scholars, and the accepted measurement is now 7 feet in width, 4 1/2 feet in depth, along with a mass of approximately 133.4 kg. not to be confused with chris kmiec's sister's "nice, perky ass", to quote chris himself.

Crowd of starry-eyed men, women and children: "Good god, I would give my life savings to Jerry Sandusky's child rape ring to just get a glimpse of Chris' Ass! If only we could come closer!"

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